There's no such thing as chance;in which case Mr. Jagdish Narayan Arora-for all his age and servility-was nothing less than a time bomb,ticking softly away until his appointed time,in which case...we should either-optimistically-get up and cheer,because if everything is planned in advance then we all have a meaning, and are spared the terror of knowing ourselves to be random,without a why;or else,of course,we might as-pessimists give up right here and now,understanding the futility of thought decision action,since nothing we think makes any difference anyway;things will be as they will.Where,then,is optimism?In fate or in chaos???. . .Was me being opti-or pessi-mistic when my father told me the news, and I replied with,"it was only a matter of time,chalo mukti mili". My Grandfather's death,it seems,was fated.
Today is a very unusual day to start my blog.But I have no doubt whatsoever that it is the most appropriate one.Today I lost the man ,who not wholly but partially,is responsible for my very existence: "My Grandfather".But my heart is not full with grief and sorrow about this loss. I am, in a way, happy for him.Because for six years I have seen him longing to meet the love of his life,his better half:"My Grandmother".I hope he meets her in heaven.
I got this news today morning from my father,who also sounded relieved. Since morning I had been thinking about death and life . I feel this vacuum being created in our lives. I asked myself was he really dead today or the day when he first showed signs of Alzheimer's disease.Yes its true that in his last days with us, he could barely remember anything about his life.....about us.I met him ten days before and he could vaguely recognize me.It was all very painful.Also this sudden loss made me think that when someone leaves this world.Is it the loss of one person only? I think when we loose someone we loose a part of history.We loose a whole unique way of looking at the world.I believe that the understanding of this world varies for each individual and is unique.I don't know how many untold stories about his childhood,the story about his college ,his first crush, his hour of greatness and that of failure, his untold secrets are lost into the oblivion.Yes we lost a small part of history today.
Life is an open road. . . . . .the best story never told.. . . . .
4 comments:
nice way 2 start a blog.....no comments...only compliments
btw...wats severility supposed to mean....dat is theoir aint any such word in english languagebed
oooopppsss. . ..
Its servility. . .
m sorry dude. . . .
it has been corrected. .
Thats true... With the end of Mr. J.N Arora we certailnly lost a part of History that was untold to us. When my grand mother died i was unconscious and could not even see the face of the lady who loved me the most. I thanked GOD for not letting me face the truth...face to face that she is no more... no more to scold me, no more to love me... no more to give me additional "Rupees" on my Birthday without Bauji's knowledge... no more to lend me 10-15 extra rupees to play videogames apart from my pocket money... no more to worry for me when i am in pain... But this time i couldnt escape.. I would have if given a choice. I stood there by Bauji's side with unstirred tears in my eyes performing the last rituals...I looked around with my eyes and got a blurr image of all the people present...The only person i could see with tears in her eyes was my mother and the reason for those tears was well understood as she had been the last person to have understood Bauji's emotions and state of mind... then i saw my father and i could not find any drop of tear in his eyes, but his eyes were depicting as he was feeling guilty of the fact that he sent Bauji to Chacha's place and that has been a prime reason for his end before time... and rest of the people around were just waiting for the rituals to get over...The only thought i was left with was that in our day to day lives we forget that one day we have to die as well and either we dont want to realise the fact or we just simply forget....
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